Chuckles for August 2012



August 01
At what time does a duck wake up?
At the quack of dawn!kids.yahoo.com/

August 03
What do you call ham that you really want?
Pork-you-pine!kids.yahoo.com/

August 06
What kind of a garden does a baker have?
A flour garden!kids.yahoo.com/

August 08
What is the man in the moon's favorite drink?
Crater-ade!kids.yahoo.com/

August 10
What's the best way to make straight A's?
With a ruler!kids.yahoo.com/

August 13
Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR". What's my mother going to do?onelinerz.net/

August 15
At what time does a duck wake up?
At the quack of dawn!onelinerz.net/

August 17
What does baseball have in common with pancakes?
They both rely on the batter!onelinerz.net/

August 20
What lies on the ground a hundred feet in the air?
A centipede!kids.yahoo.com/jokes

August 20
What lies on the ground a hundred feet in the air?
A centipede!
kids.yahoo.com/jokes

August 22
Why didn't the clam share it's pearls?
Because it was shellfish!
kids.yahoo.com/jokes

August 24
What is a pie's favorite sport?
Pie Kwan Do!
kids.yahoo.com/jokes

August 27
Why did a boy take a bale of hay to bed with him?
To feed his nightmare!
kids.yahoo.com/jokes

August 29
What happened to the plant in math class?
It grew square roots!
kids.yahoo.com/jokes

August 31
What do Winnie the Pooh and Alexander the Great have in common?
They both have the same middle name!
kids.yahoo.com/jokes

Back: Past Chuckles





Local events heading








  Today is Thursday, Aug. 21, the 233rd day of 2014. There are 132 days left in the year.

1864 -- 150 years ago: Sheriff McLaughlin had the misfortune to dislocate his right shoulder some days ago when his carriage upset. He is now able to walk about but has a very sore shoulder.
1889 -- 125 years ago: A kindergarten was started in the downtown district of Rock Island with the Misses Dodie Hawes and Grace Knowlton as teachers.
1914 -- 100 years ago: Pope Pius X died in Rome.
1939 -- 75 years ago: Rock Island's new theater was named Esquire.
1964 -- 50 years ago: The J.I. Case Co. plant in Bettendorf will add from 150 to 200 employees by Jan. 1 a spokesman for the company said today. The Bettendorf Works today had a payroll of 1,350, but an increased production schedule will require additional people.
1989 -- 25 years ago: The Illowa Council Boy Scouts of America reached and passed its campaign goal in a drive that began 14 months ago by raising more than $2.2 million for the expansion of Loud Thunder Reservation near Andalusia.






(More History)