Chuckles for August 2012



August 01
At what time does a duck wake up?
At the quack of dawn!kids.yahoo.com/

August 03
What do you call ham that you really want?
Pork-you-pine!kids.yahoo.com/

August 06
What kind of a garden does a baker have?
A flour garden!kids.yahoo.com/

August 08
What is the man in the moon's favorite drink?
Crater-ade!kids.yahoo.com/

August 10
What's the best way to make straight A's?
With a ruler!kids.yahoo.com/

August 13
Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR". What's my mother going to do?onelinerz.net/

August 15
At what time does a duck wake up?
At the quack of dawn!onelinerz.net/

August 17
What does baseball have in common with pancakes?
They both rely on the batter!onelinerz.net/

August 20
What lies on the ground a hundred feet in the air?
A centipede!kids.yahoo.com/jokes

August 20
What lies on the ground a hundred feet in the air?
A centipede!
kids.yahoo.com/jokes

August 22
Why didn't the clam share it's pearls?
Because it was shellfish!
kids.yahoo.com/jokes

August 24
What is a pie's favorite sport?
Pie Kwan Do!
kids.yahoo.com/jokes

August 27
Why did a boy take a bale of hay to bed with him?
To feed his nightmare!
kids.yahoo.com/jokes

August 29
What happened to the plant in math class?
It grew square roots!
kids.yahoo.com/jokes

August 31
What do Winnie the Pooh and Alexander the Great have in common?
They both have the same middle name!
kids.yahoo.com/jokes

Back: Past Chuckles





Local events heading








  Today is Tuesday, July 22, the 203rd day of 2014. There are 162 days left in the year.

1864 -- 150 years ago: Everybody is invited to go on a moonlight excursion next Monday evening on the steamer New Boston. The trip will be from Davenport to Muscatine and back.
1889 -- 125 years ago: The mayor and bridge committee let a contract to the Clinton Bridge company for a $1,125 iron bridge across Sears canal near Milan.
1914 -- 100 years ago: Injunction proceedings to compel the Central Association to keep a baseball team in Rock Island for the remainder of the season were contemplated by some of the Rock Island fans, but they decided to defer action.
1939 -- 75 years ago: The first of the new and more powerful diesel engines built for the Rock Island Lines for the proposed Chicago-Denver run, passed thru the Tri-Cities this morning.
1964 -- 50 years ago: The Rock Island Rescue Mission is negotiating for the purchase of the Prince Hall Masonic Home located at 37th Avenue and 5th Street, Rock Island.
1989 -- 25 years ago: Quad Cities Container Terminal is being lauded as a giant business boon that will save several days and hundreds of dollars on each goods shipment to the coasts. The Quad Cities Container Terminal is the final piece of the puzzle that opens up increase access to world markets, Robert Goldstein said.








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