Chuckles for February 2012

February 01
What do runners do when they forget something?
They jog their memory! (jokesbykids.com)

February 03
What do garbage men eat?
Junk food! (jokesbykids.com)

February 06
How do athletes stay cool during games?
They stand near the fans! (jokesbykids.com)

February 08
How do bees get to school?
On the school buzz! (jokesbykids.com)

February 10
Why did the girl take a ruler to bed with her?
She wanted to find out how long she sleeps! (jokesbykids.com)

February 13
What candy do you eat on the playground?
Recess pieces! (jokesbykids.com)

February 15
Where do doctors go on vacation?
Ill-inois! (jokesbykids.com)

February 17
Why do cows have bells?
Because their horns don't work! (jokesbykids.com)

February 20
What did the frog order at McDonald's?
French flies and a diet croak! (jokesbykids.com)

February 23
What do ants use to smell good?

February 23
What do ants use to smell good?

February 27
What's green and sings?
Elvis Parsley!(jokesbykids.com)

February 29
Where did you learn to make ice cream?
In sundae school!(jokesbykids.com)

Back: Past Chuckles

Local events heading

  Today is Sunday, Sept. 21, the 264th day of 2014. There are 101 days left in the year.

1864 -- 150 years ago: We hear that Col. Reynolds has employed C.D. Merrill to drill for water to supply the Rock Island Barracks.
1889 -- 125 years ago: Billy Catton, famous billard player, returned to Rock Island with a view to making this city his home in the future.
1914 -- 100 years ago: The belief is growing that a great decisive battle of the World War was being fought at Verdun, a strong fortress of France on the Meuse near the French frontier, according to a London dispatch.
1939 -- 75 years ago: William Stremmel, 91, Rock Island's last Civil War veteran, died.
1964 -- 50 years ago: Workmen of the Midwest Wrecking Co., Clinton, have begun razing the historic old office building of Deere & Co., 1325 3rd Ave., Moline. The site will be used by the Deere Plow Works for its shipping and receiving department.
1989 -- 25 years ago: East Moline developer Jim Massa says the financial package for the proposed $34.5 million Quad City International Motor Speedway is down to making sure "all the i's are dotted and t's are crossed. Finalizing this will give the green light to see if NASCAR and CART, the auto racing sanctioning bodies, approve race dates.

(More History)