Chuckles for August 2011



August 01
Golfer: "Do you think my game is improving?"
Caddy: "Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now."
(free-funny-jokes.com/)

August 04
What's the difference between a dentist and a Yankees fan?
One roots for the yanks and the other yanks for the roots!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

August 04
What's the difference between a dentist and a Yankees fan?
One roots for the yanks and the other yanks for the roots!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

August 09
What is the biggest mouse in the world?
Enormous!
(jokes-best.com/)

August 11
How do you make an egg roll?
Enormous!
Push it!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

August 15
What word is always spelled incorrectly?
Incorrectly!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

August 18
What do you call a short psychic who escaped from jail?
A small medium at large!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

August 22
What starts with T, ends in T, and is full of T?
A Teapot!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

August 25
What does a martial arts fan eat?
Kung Food!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

August 29
What did the limestone say to the granite?
Don't take me for granite!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

Back: Past Chuckles





Local events heading








  Today is Monday, April 21, the 111th day of 2014. There are 254 days left in the year.

1864 -- 150 years ago: The female sex seems to have gone crazy on the subject of dry goods. When high prices keep them from increasing their wardrobes, they turn to stealing. Yard goods, hats, shoes and other items are being picked up and carried home.
1889 -- 125 years ago: Members of Everts Commandery No. 18, Knights Templar, under Commander H.C. Cleaveland, marched from the Masonic Temple to Trinity Episcopal Church for their annual Easter services.
1914 -- 100 years ago: Nate Hultgren pitched the Augustana College baseball team to a 10-3 victory over Carthage, striking out 11 men and allowing only four hits.
1939 -- 75 years ago: Marvel Leonhardi, a Rock Island High School senior, was the winner of an essay contest on advertising sponsored by The Argus and Advertising Age, a national advertising publication.
1964 -- 50 years ago: The Augustana College band drew a crowd of 1,200 people for its annual home concert in Centennial Hall. The size of the crowd was indicative of the fact the band is rapidly approaching the stature of the Augustana Choir.
1989 -- 25 years ago: A benefit to raise money for extracurricular activities in the Rock Island Milan School District will be April 27 at the Quad City Downs harness race track. People buying $17.50 tickets to the second annual "Night at the Quad City Downs" will be entitled to an evening of harness racing and dinner.






(More History)