Chuckles for August 2011



August 01
Golfer: "Do you think my game is improving?"
Caddy: "Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now."
(free-funny-jokes.com/)

August 04
What's the difference between a dentist and a Yankees fan?
One roots for the yanks and the other yanks for the roots!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

August 04
What's the difference between a dentist and a Yankees fan?
One roots for the yanks and the other yanks for the roots!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

August 09
What is the biggest mouse in the world?
Enormous!
(jokes-best.com/)

August 11
How do you make an egg roll?
Enormous!
Push it!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

August 15
What word is always spelled incorrectly?
Incorrectly!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

August 18
What do you call a short psychic who escaped from jail?
A small medium at large!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

August 22
What starts with T, ends in T, and is full of T?
A Teapot!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

August 25
What does a martial arts fan eat?
Kung Food!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

August 29
What did the limestone say to the granite?
Don't take me for granite!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

Back: Past Chuckles





Local events heading








  Today is Saturday, Aug. 23, the 235th day of 2014. There are 130 days left in the year.

1864 -- 150 years ago: Telegraph reports state that, about 6 o'clock on the evening of the 20th, Quantrill, with about 800 of his thieves and robbers, surrounded Lawrence, Kan., and burned it to the ground.
1889 -- 125 years ago: Newton Beer's production of "Lost in London," which had a successful run for three seasons, was presented at Harper's Theater.
1914 -- 100 years ago: The German army commanded by Fran Duke Albrecht of Wurtemburg defeated the French army at Neufchmtenu.
1939 -- 75 years ago: John Deere Harvester Works in East Moline is starting a four-story, $104,000 addition to the combine assembly building.
1964 -- 50 years ago: Short Hills Country Club held onto its lead yesterday despite a rally by host Davenport Country Club and claimed the team title in the Sunshine Cup golf series.
1989 -- 25 years ago: Quad-Citians can look forward to more excitement and fun at this year's Rock Island Labor Day parade at 9:30 a.m. Sept 4, say organizers. This years theme is "Celebrate Rock Island."






(More History)