Chuckles for June 2011



June 02
What do basketball players and babies have in comon?
They both dribble!
(kids.yahoo.com/)

June 06
A woman was telling her friend , "It is I who made my husband a millionaire." "And what was he before you married him." Asked the friend. The woman replied, " A multi-millionaire".(.jokes-best.com/)

June 09
What kind of phone does the ocean have?
A shell-phone!(kids.yahoo.com/)

June 13
Why did the bacon laugh?
Because the egg cracked a yolk!(kids.yahoo.com/)

June 16
Whats brown, hairy and wears sunglasses?
A coconut on vacation!(kids.yahoo.com/)

June 20
What should you do when it rains cats and dogs?
Be careful not to step on a poodle!(jokesbykids.com/)

June 23
Teacher asks student: What is the half of 8? Student: Miss horizontally or vertically? Teacher: What do mean? Student: Horizontally it is 0 and vertically it is 3.
(jokes-best.com/)

June 23
Teacher asks student: What is the half of 8?
Student: Horizontally or vertically?
Teacher: What do mean?
Student: Horizontally it is 0 and vertically it is 3.
(jokes-best.com/)

June 27
Teacher: “Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?”
Student: “On the bottom!”
(independencedayfun.com/)

June 30
Where did George Washington buy his hatchet?
At the chopping mall!
(strangecosmos.com/)

Back: Past Chuckles






Local events heading








  Today is Monday, Sept. 1, the 244th day of 2014. There are 121 days left in the year.

1864 -- 150 years ago: We are informed by J.H. Hull that the reason the street sprinkler was not at work yesterday settling the dust on the streets, was because one of his horses was injured.
1889 -- 125 years ago: Bonnie McGregor, a fleet-footed stallion owned by S.W. Wheelock of this community, covered himself with glory at Lexington, Ky, when he ran a mile in 2:13 1/2. The horse's value was estimated as at least $50,000.
1914 -- 100 years ago: Troops are pouring into Paris to prepare for defense of the city. The German army is reported to be only 60 miles from the capital of France.
1939 -- 75 years ago: The German army has invaded Poland in undeclared warfare. Poland has appealed to Great Britain and France for aid.
1964 -- 50 years ago: Publication of a plant newspaper, the Farmall Works News, has been launched at the Rock Island IHC factory and replaces a managerial newsletter.
1989 -- 25 years ago: Officials predict Monday's Rock Island Labor Parade will be the biggest and best ever. Last minute work continues on floats and costumes for the parade, which steps off a 9:30 a.m.




(More History)