Chuckles for April 2009



April 02
Q. What happened to the cat who ate a ball of yarn?
A. She had mittens!

April 06
Q. What super hero lives in a pot?
A. Souperman!

April 09
Q. What did the limestone say to the geologist?
A. Don't take me for granite!

April 13
Q. Why did the bacon laugh?
A. Because the egg cracked a yolk!

April 16
Q. What do runners do when they forget something?
A. They jog their memory!

April 20
Q. Why does a wrestler bring a key to the match?
A. To get out of a headlock!

April 23
Q. What's a vampire's favorite fruit?
A. A neck-tarine!

April 27
Q. What do you call a hippo with chicken pox?
A. A hippo-spot-amus!

April 30
Q. What brand of underwear does King Tut wear?
A. Fruit of the Tomb!

Back: Past Chuckles






Local events heading








  Today is Monday, Sept. 1, the 244th day of 2014. There are 121 days left in the year.

1864 -- 150 years ago: We are informed by J.H. Hull that the reason the street sprinkler was not at work yesterday settling the dust on the streets, was because one of his horses was injured.
1889 -- 125 years ago: Bonnie McGregor, a fleet-footed stallion owned by S.W. Wheelock of this community, covered himself with glory at Lexington, Ky, when he ran a mile in 2:13 1/2. The horse's value was estimated as at least $50,000.
1914 -- 100 years ago: Troops are pouring into Paris to prepare for defense of the city. The German army is reported to be only 60 miles from the capital of France.
1939 -- 75 years ago: The German army has invaded Poland in undeclared warfare. Poland has appealed to Great Britain and France for aid.
1964 -- 50 years ago: Publication of a plant newspaper, the Farmall Works News, has been launched at the Rock Island IHC factory and replaces a managerial newsletter.
1989 -- 25 years ago: Officials predict Monday's Rock Island Labor Parade will be the biggest and best ever. Last minute work continues on floats and costumes for the parade, which steps off a 9:30 a.m.




(More History)