Chuckles for November 2007



November 01
Q. Where do ghost go for fun?
A. To the boo-vies.

November 02
Q. What kind of gum do ghosts chew?
A. Boo Boo Gum.

November 05
Q: Why can't you take a turkey to church?
A: Because they use such fowl language.

November 06
Q: How do you make gold soup?
A: Just throw in fourteen carrots. (carats)

November 07
Q: What happened when the turkey got into a fight?
A: He got the stuffing knocked out of him!

November 08
Q: Why did the Pilgrims eat turkey at Thanksgiving?
A: Because they couldn't get the moose in the oven!

November 09
Q: What’s blue and covered with feathers?
A: A turkey holding its breath!

November 12
A reporter was interviewing a 104 year-old woman:
"And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" She simply replied, "No peer pressure."

November 13
Obviously crime pays, or there'd be no crime.
--G. Gordon Liddy

November 14
Girls are always running through my mind. They don't dare walk.
--Andy Gibb

November 15
Which hand should you use to stir tea?
(Neither... it's better to use a spoon.)

November 19
What's the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner?
The turKEY

November 26
What do elves learn in school?
The elf-abet

November 27
What Christmas Carol is a favorite of parents?
Silent Night

November 28
Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
So he can hoe, hoe, hoe.

November 29
What did the ghost say to Santa Claus?
I'll have a boo Christmas without you.

November 30
What kind of bird can write?
A Pen-guin

Back: Past Chuckles





Local events heading








  Today is Thursday, April 24, the 114th day of 2014. There are 251 days left in the year.

1864 -- 150 years ago: We learn that it is a contemplation to start a paper mill in Rock Island during the summer by a gentleman from the East.
1889 -- 125 years ago: The gates of Oklahoma were swung open at noon today, and a throng of more than 30,000 settlers started over its soil.
1914 -- 100 years ago: The Iowa Coliseum Co. was incorporated with $40,000 capital and planned a building on 4th Street between Warren and Green streets in Davenport.
1939 -- 75 years ago: Plans are being discussed for resurfacing the streets in the entire downtown district of Rock Island.
1964 -- 50 years ago: Some 45 jobs will be created at J.I. Case Co.'s Rock Island plant in a expansion of operations announced yesterday afternoon at the firm's headquarters in Racine, Wis.
1989 -- 25 years ago: Gardeners and farmers cheered, but not all Quad-Citians found joy Saturday as more than an inch of rain fell on the area. Motorists faced dangerous, rain-slick roads as the water activated grease and grime that had built up during dry weather.








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