Chuckles for November 2007



November 01
Q. Where do ghost go for fun?
A. To the boo-vies.

November 02
Q. What kind of gum do ghosts chew?
A. Boo Boo Gum.

November 05
Q: Why can't you take a turkey to church?
A: Because they use such fowl language.

November 06
Q: How do you make gold soup?
A: Just throw in fourteen carrots. (carats)

November 07
Q: What happened when the turkey got into a fight?
A: He got the stuffing knocked out of him!

November 08
Q: Why did the Pilgrims eat turkey at Thanksgiving?
A: Because they couldn't get the moose in the oven!

November 09
Q: What’s blue and covered with feathers?
A: A turkey holding its breath!

November 12
A reporter was interviewing a 104 year-old woman:
"And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" She simply replied, "No peer pressure."

November 13
Obviously crime pays, or there'd be no crime.
--G. Gordon Liddy

November 14
Girls are always running through my mind. They don't dare walk.
--Andy Gibb

November 15
Which hand should you use to stir tea?
(Neither... it's better to use a spoon.)

November 19
What's the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner?
The turKEY

November 26
What do elves learn in school?
The elf-abet

November 27
What Christmas Carol is a favorite of parents?
Silent Night

November 28
Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
So he can hoe, hoe, hoe.

November 29
What did the ghost say to Santa Claus?
I'll have a boo Christmas without you.

November 30
What kind of bird can write?
A Pen-guin

Back: Past Chuckles





Local events heading








  Today is Friday, Sept. 19, the 262nd day of 2014. There are 103 days left in the year.
1864 -- 150 years ago: Charles M. Osborn of this city, a lawyer of prominence, who voted for Lincoln in 1860 is now out strong for McClellan and will take the stump for him.
1889 -- 125 years ago: The George Fleming company had begun its dried fruit packing in a branch plant on 16th Street, Rock Island, employing nearly a hundred workers.
1914 -- 100 years ago: The cornerstone of the new Eagles home was laid. Building committee members were John Kobeman, Fred Ehmke and Frank Wich.
1939 -- 75 years ago: Former Kaiser Wilhelm, in exile, is sad as the Nazis march with communists.
1964 -- 50 years ago: Ninety-two members of the acappella choir at Davenport's West High School today accepted an invitation to perform at the New York World's Fair on June 13, 1965.
1989 -- 25 years ago: A Rock Island woman is one of 50 winners of $10,000 in cash in the Illinois State Lottery's "Celebration "89" instant ticket game. Dawn Loeffler was the third winner to be chosen through daily drawings that began Aug. 28 and will run 50 consecutive days.






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