LOCAL FOOTBALL SCORING UPDATES PRESENTED BY THE HUNGRY HOBO:

Chuckles for October 2007



October 04
No one has a finer command of language than the person who keeps his mouth shut.
--Sam Rayburn (1882 - 1961)

October 08
It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.
--George Burns

October 09
What some people mistake for the high cost of living is really the cost of high living.
--Doug Larson

October 11
I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
--Henny Youngman (1906 - 1998)

October 15
Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else's can shorten it.
--Cullen Hightower

October 17
What's the best way to prevent diseases caused by biting insects?
(Don't bite any.)

October 18
What is small, purple, and dangerous? (A grape with a machine gun.)

October 19
Teacher: What's the formula for water? Student: H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O Teacher: That's not the formula I gave you. Student: Well you said H to O.

October 19
Teacher: What's the formula for water?
Student: H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O
Teacher: That's not the formula I gave you.
Student: Well you said H to O.

October 22
What do you call a sheep that is covered with chocolate?
(A Hershey "baaa") id H to O.

October 22
What do you call a sheep that is covered with chocolate?
(A Hershey "baaa")

October 23
How many beans can you put into an empty bag?
(One. After that the bag isn't empty.)

October 24
Real Estate Agent: Here's a house without any flaws.
Customer: Then what do you walk on?

October 25
What's long and yellow and always points north? (A magnetic banana.)

October 29
Q. What is a Mummie's favorite type of music?
A. Wrap!!!!!

October 30
Q. Why did the ghost go into the bar?
A. For the Boos.

October 31
Q. What tops off a ghost's ice cream sundae?
A. Whipped scream.

Back: Past Chuckles





Local events heading








  Today is Monday, Sept. 22, the 265th day of 2014. There are 100 days left in the year.

1864 -- 150 years ago: The board of education has granted Thursday as a holiday for the children, with the expectation that parents who desire to have their children attend the Scott County Fair will do so on that day and save irregularity the rest of the week.
1889 -- 125 years ago: The guard fence around the new cement walk at the Harper House has been removed. The blocks are diamond shape, alternating in black and white.
1914 -- 100 years ago: The Rev. R.B. Williams, former pastor of the First Methodist Church, Rock Island, was named superintendent of the Rock Island District.
1939 -- 75 years ago: Abnormally high temperatures and lack of rainfall in Illinois during the past week have speeded maturing of corn and soybean crops.
1964 -- 50 years ago: Installation of a new television system in St. Anthony's Hospital, which includes a closed circuit channel as well as the three regular Quad-Cities channels, has been completed and now is in operation.
1989 -- 25 years ago: When the new Moline High School was built in 1958, along with it were plans to construct a football field in the bowl near 34th Street on the campus. Wednesday afternoon, more than 30 years later, the Moline Board of Education Athletic Board sent the ball rolling toward the possible construction of that field by asking superintendent Richard Hennigan to take to the board of education a proposal to hire a consultant.






(More History)