Chuckles for August 2007



August 02
Write a wise saying and your name will live forever.
--Anonymous

August 06
One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.
--Rita Mae Brown

August 08
Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.
--Fran Lebowitz (1950 - )

August 09
America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week.
--Evan Esar (1899 - 1995)

August 13
Every time I paint a portrait I lose a friend.
--John Singer Sargent (1856 - 1925)

August 16
Why are frogs so happy? They eat watever bugs them!
--allaboutfrogs.org

August 20
Isn't it interesting that the same people who laugh at science fiction listen to weather forecasts and economists?
-- Kelvin Throop III

August 21
To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer.
--Farmers' Almanac, 1978

August 23
Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.
--Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)

August 27
Save a little money each month and at the end of the year you'll be surprised at how little you have.
--Ernest Haskins

August 28
Did you hear about the mattress tester who was fired? He stayed awake on the job.

August 30
What does a pig use to write with? (A pigpen.)

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Local events heading








  Today is Saturday, April 19, the 109th day of 2014. There are 256 days left in the year.

1864 -- 150 years ago: Miss McCorkindale has opened millinery rooms over Gimbel's dry goods store, where she offers a choice lot of millinery goods, which she will manufacture to order.
1889 -- 125 years ago: The little South Park Presbyterian chapel celebrated it first Easter decorated with flowers for an afternoon worship service attended by a large congregation.
1914 -- 100 years ago: The Wennerberg Chorus of Augustana College has returned from a 2,000-mile tour in the Eastern states and Illinois.
1939 -- 75 years ago: Col. Charles Lindbergh has stated that he is convinced that Germany's air force is equal to the combined sky fleets of her potential European foes.
1964 -- 50 years ago: Small gas motors may be permitted on boats in the lake to be built in Loud Thunder Forest Preserve. The prospect was discussed yesterday at a meeting of the Rock Island County Forest Preserve Commission.
1989 -- 25 years ago: The annual Dispatch/Rock Island Argus Spelling Bee continues to be a family tradition. Ed Lee, an eighth-grader at John Deere Junior High School, Moline, is the 1989 spelling bee champion from among 49 top spellers in Rock Island, Henry and Mercer counties. He advances to the competition in Washington, D.C. Runnerup was Ed's sister, Susan.






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