Chuckles for November 2006



November 01
If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?
Their AGE!
--theholidayspot.com

November 02
What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children?
If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!
--theholidayspot.com

November 02
Q. What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children?
A. If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!
--theholidayspot.com

November 06
Q. If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?
A. Their AGE!
--theholidayspot.com

November 07
Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you.--Author Unknown

November 09
When asked to write a paper on what he was thankful for on Thanksgiving little Timmy wrote:
I'm thankful that I'm not a turkey!
--jokesbykids.com

November 10
Teacher: "Why did the Pilgrims sail to America?"
Student: "Maybe they missed their plane."

November 13
Q. How do you keep a turkey in suspense?
A. I'll tell you next week...

November 15
He who laughs, lasts!
--Mary Pettibone Poole

November 16
When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness.
--lotsofjokes.com

November 17
Why do pilgrims pants keep falling down?
Because their belt buckles are on their hats!
--jokesbykids.com

November 27
There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.
--Mary Wilson Little

November 28
You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.
--Dave Barry (1947 - )

November 29
What do monkeys sing at Christmas?
Jungle Bells, Jungle bells.. !
--theholidayspot.com

November 30
How long does it take to burn a candle down?
About a wick!
--theholidayspot.com

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Local events heading








  Today is Wednesday, Sept. 17, the 260th day of 2014. There are 105 days left in the year.
1864 -- 150 years ago: We are told league merchants have paid no attention to the prohibition on selling ammunition, but continue to sell just as before the order was issued.
1889 -- 125 years ago: The Rev. R.F. Sweet, rector of Trinity Episcopal Parish, left for the East to visit his boyhood home in Boston before attending the general convention of the Episcopal Church in New York.
1914 -- 100 years ago: Dr. E.A. Anderson was named to succeed Dr. E.L. Kerns as head physician of the Modern Woodmen of America, and moved to Rock Island from Holdingford, Minn.
1939 -- 75 years ago: One week late, because of the outbreak of war, Dr. E.L. Beyer resumed his work as professor of romance languages at Augustana College. Dr. and Mrs. Beyer left Germany on the last train to the Belgian border.
1964 -- 50 years ago: Employees in Turnstyle stores in Moline and Davenport will vote Oct. 2 in an election set up by the Chicago regional office of the National Labor Relations Board. Employees will vote either for the Retail Clerk International or for no union.
1989 -- 25 years ago: Rock Island High School is considering a step to help teen moms stay in school and get their diploma. The school board is expected to vote tonight on instituting an on-site child care center.


(More History)