LOCAL FOOTBALL SCORING UPDATES PRESENTED BY THE HUNGRY HOBO:

Chuckles for August 2006



August 01
Half of the American people have never read a newspaper. Half never voted for President. One hopes it is the same half.
--Gore Vidal (1925 - )

August 02
The human race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime television.
--Unknown

August 03
My toughest fight was with my first wife.
--Muhammad Ali (1942 - )

August 04
The only winner in the War of 1812 was Tchaikovsky
--Solomon Short

August 07
I am not young enough to know everything.
--Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900)

August 08
It's never just a game when you're winning.
--George Carlin

August 09
There is no such thing as "fun for the whole family."
--Jerry Seinfeld

August 11
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
--Groucho Marx (1890 - 1977)

August 14
I'm as pure as the driven slush.
--Tallulah Bankhead (1903 - 1968)

August 15
Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it's worse when they are wearing dark glasses and have streamers in their antlers because then you know they were enjoying themselves at a party when they were shot.
--Ellen DeGeneres

August 17
The trouble with weather forecasting is that it's right too often for us to ignore it and wrong too often for us to rely on it.
--Patrick Young

August 18
The only time people dislike gossip is when you gossip about them.
--Will Rogers (1879 - 1935)

August 21
Money can't buy happiness, but neither can poverty.
--Leo Rosten (1908 - )

August 22
Part of the inhumanity of the computer is that, once it is competently programmed and working smoothly, it is completely honest.
--Isaac Asimov (1920 - 1992)

August 23
Millions long for immortality who don't know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.
--Susan Ertz

August 28
Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.
--W. C. Fields (1880 - 1946)

August 29
The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any.
--Katharine Whitehorn

August 30
Health food makes me sick.
--Calvin Trillin (1935 - )

August 31
Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.
--Jeff Valdez

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Local events heading








  Today is Monday, Sept. 22, the 265th day of 2014. There are 100 days left in the year.

1864 -- 150 years ago: The board of education has granted Thursday as a holiday for the children, with the expectation that parents who desire to have their children attend the Scott County Fair will do so on that day and save irregularity the rest of the week.
1889 -- 125 years ago: The guard fence around the new cement walk at the Harper House has been removed. The blocks are diamond shape, alternating in black and white.
1914 -- 100 years ago: The Rev. R.B. Williams, former pastor of the First Methodist Church, Rock Island, was named superintendent of the Rock Island District.
1939 -- 75 years ago: Abnormally high temperatures and lack of rainfall in Illinois during the past week have speeded maturing of corn and soybean crops.
1964 -- 50 years ago: Installation of a new television system in St. Anthony's Hospital, which includes a closed circuit channel as well as the three regular Quad-Cities channels, has been completed and now is in operation.
1989 -- 25 years ago: When the new Moline High School was built in 1958, along with it were plans to construct a football field in the bowl near 34th Street on the campus. Wednesday afternoon, more than 30 years later, the Moline Board of Education Athletic Board sent the ball rolling toward the possible construction of that field by asking superintendent Richard Hennigan to take to the board of education a proposal to hire a consultant.






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