Chuckles for October 2005
October 03
The new employee stood before the paper shredder looking confused. "Need some help?" a secretary, walking by, asked. "Yes," he replied, "how does this thing work?" "Simple," she said, taking the fat report from his hand and feeding it into the shredder. "Thanks, but where do the copies come out?"
--lotsofjokes.com
October 04
Q. What did the Mommy ghost say to the baby ghost?
A. Don't spook until your spooken to.
--lotsofjokes.com
October 05
A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that measured his speed using radar and photographed his car. He later received in the mail a ticket for $40 and a photo of his car. Instead of payment, he sent the police department a photograph of $40. Several days later, he received a letter from the police that contained another picture... of handcuffs.
--lotsofjokes.com
October 06
A guy went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a teepee, and then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?"
The doctor replied, "It's very simple. You're two tents."
--lotsofjokes.com
October 06
A guy went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a teepee, and then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?"
The doctor replied, "It's very simple. You're two tents."
October 10
You know you are addicted to coffee if ...
You help your dog chase its tail.
--lotsofjokes.com
October 11
What do you call a fat Jack-O-Lantern?
A plumpkin!
--lotsofjokes.com
October 12
Why doesn't Dracula have any friends?
Because he's a pain in the neck!
--lotsofjokes.com
October 13
What kind of mistakes do spooks make?
Boo boos
--lotsofjokes.com
October 13
What kind of mistakes do spooks make?
Boo boos
--lotsofjokes.com
October 14
Why did the ghost go to the doctor?
To get his boo-ster shot?
--lotsofjokes.com
October 17
Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
His ghoul friend.
--lotsofjokes.com
October 18
Why don't witches like to ride their brooms when they're angry?
They're afraid of flying off the handle!
--lotsofjokes.com
October 19
Where does Dracula water ski?
On Lake Erie
--lotsofjokes.com
October 20
What did the Mommy ghost say to the baby ghost?
Don't spook until your spooken to.
--lotsofjokes.com
October 21
What type of coffee do vampires prefer?
Decoffinated!
--lotsofjokes.com
October 24
What is a vampire's favorite holiday?
Fangsgiving...
--theholidayspot.com
October 25
What does the papa ghost say to his family when driving?
Fasten your sheet belts...
--theholidayspot.com
October 26
What is a ghoul's favorite flavor?
Lemon-slime...
--theholidayspot.com
October 28
How do witches keep their hair in place while flying?
With scare spray...
--theholidayspot.com
October 31
What do birds give out on Halloween night?
Tweets!
--theholidayspot.com
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