Chuckles for April 2003

April 01
There are more chickens than people in the world.
(tech-sol.net/humor/)

April 02
At lunchtime, sit in your parked car w/sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
(tech-sol.net/humor/)

April 03
I saw Elvis. He sat between me and Bigfoot on the UFO.
(tech-sol.net/humor/)

April 04
Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.
--Fran Lebowitz

April 07
What some people mistake for the high cost of living is really the cost of high living.
-- Doug Larson

April 08
The phrase that is guaranteed to wake up an audience:
"And in conclusion."

April 09
Charlie Chaplin once won third prize in a Charlie Chaplin look-alike contest.
www.tech-sol.net/humor/

April 10
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
www.tech-sol.net/humor/

April 11
Artificial Intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
-- Unknown

April 14
Q. How do crazy people go through the forest?
A. They take the psycho path.
www.tech-sol.net/humor/

April 15
Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
www.tech-sol.net/humor/

April 16
My favorite mythical creature? The honest politician.
www.tech-sol.net/humor/

April 17
My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned: couldn't concentrate.
www.tech-sol.net/humor/

April 18
"Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps."
Emo Philips.

April 21
A lot of fellows nowadays have a B.A., M.D., or Ph.D. Unfortunately, they don't have a J.O.B.
Fats Domino (1928 - )

April 22
Nobody believes the official spokesman... but everybody trusts an unidentified source.
--Ron Nesen

April 23
Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature.
--Kin Hubbard

April 24
"First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down."
-- George Burns.

April 28
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
www.tech-sol.net/humor/

April 28
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
www.tech-sol.net/humor/

April 28
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
www.tech-sol.net/humor/

April 29
Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic.
--Dan Rather (1931 - )

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